I (heart) GUT

When I got jumped into the GUT collective I really had no idea what was in store for me.

First off, it made me feel real cool. After running the Homeskillet for a few years and doing it slightly under the radar and for my own good benefit, it was fun to get some love and recognition once I started contributing to the Weekly as their food writer.

And it's fun to feel cool.

Second I just thought it'd introduce me to some new and interesting people, which it has, or get me on a list for a food event here and there, which it also has, but rubbing elbows with southern Arizona's culinary elite and getting invites for near impossible to get into pop-ups has been quite the shake up with my middle aged, geeky ego. It is both humbling and really awesome.

Being part of GUT has definitely made me feel cool.

One of the best things that GUT (Gastronomic Union of Tucson) does is put on a multi coursed dinner that is created and supervised by what some have called the 'Justice League of Tucson chefs'. This is open to the public, that is if they want to shell out a good $80 to be a part of the culinary experience. Which they totally should.

It all takes place at the Carriage House downtown and the first one was held on Sunday June 25th. I can't tell you how excited I was when I got my invite.

And I can't tell you how bummed I was when I had to back out.

The mid-summer stomach bug caught up with me and I kept having to text Carriage House executive chef and GUT dinner organizer Devon Sanner with the bad news. He, along with a few other chefs that were involved that night, kept asking me to "fight it", "pull through" and "just get over it already"...but the struggle was too real and I stayed home going back and forth from the couch to the toilet.

The next one was on Sunday July 30th and this one I definitely attended. I told Devon and various others that I would be there "even if things were coming out both ends". Luckily for me I was fine and dandy and was stoked to be fed by such amazing talent as CJ Hamm of Saguaro Corners, Janet Jones on loan from Hacienda del Lago, Jason, Buddy and Matt from Ermanos and, of course, Ben Forbes, Tucson's premiere butcher and owner of Forbes Meat Company.

The food was on point and inventive, taking us all on a tour through Japan, India, China and, yes, Tucson. I had such a blast and it made me look forward to the next and last GUT dinner that was to take place Sunday August 27th.

Luckily this time I took a bunch of photos for the "GUT #3: El Tour de Tastebuds", a rollicking journey through the many levels that our tongue and senses can handle on just one plate.

Here is what went down:

Like eating and drinking electric pop rocks

The Carriage House is located in a sort of alleyway, S. Arizona Ave, between Broadway and E. 12th. It started as the brainchild of both Devon Sanner and James beard award winning chef Janos Wilder as a place to hold demonstrations, cooking classes, weddings and events, such as the GUT dinners. It's a really cool space, wide open with a pass kitchen, theater lights and a sound system. I heard they do dim sum there on occasion. Haven't been invited to that yet. Guess that's a next level GUT entry...

Since this was the last GUT dinner of 2017 the place was packed. My wife and I were given a seating assignment then handed a cocktail. It was a bright yellow lemongrass citrus mezcal creation and they paired it with some kind of puffy stem flower called a 'buzz button'. The fuzzy bud created a numbing and tingling sensation, which was quite the surprise. Paired with the boozy drink, the overall experience was both alluring and almost off putting...but in a fun way.

As we chatted with folk, servers brought around a selection of hors d' oeuvres which included a pork crepinette (which basically means it was flattened), finished with a Szechuan spicy pickled peanut sauce. My favorite was the dry rubbed, pecan smoked ribs with micro greens. This was really good on so many levels. My wife loved the crostini with a pork offal schmear, black garlic oil and crispy kale. I liked that one too. I just preferred the ribs.

But that's just me.

Before long everyone began taking their seats because the dinner was about to start.

Course 1: Bitter

Devon Sanner took center stage, thanked everybody for coming and introduced us to the chefs that created each dish. Tonight they would include Izaak Morhaim of Jackson Bar + Eatery, David Solorzano of Cielos at Lodge on the Desert, Sam Krajnak from Pasco, Mat Cable of Fresco Pizza, Nohemi Montoya from Lowes Ventana Resort and Travis Peters (who recently took the title of Tucson Iron Chef) of The Parish among a slew of other very talented chefs. Like I said, the Justice League of Tucson culinary heavy hitters.

First up was the "Bitter" course which boasted a petite pork osso bucco, charred dandelion greens, a pomegranate gastrique (a sweet and sour sauce deglazed in vinegar), grapefruit espuma (foam) and tripas (tripe) cracklings.

This was interesting. Bitter came in many formats here; the dandelion greens, the grapefruit foam and the pomegranate gastrique.  The pork osso bucco was tender and a lot of fun to eat. It was small, just a bite or two and if this was a proper "meal" sized dish it would kill in any restaurant as a main dish.

We were off and running, taste buds glowing from bits of pungent buds, strong drink, pork nasty bits and tart crispiness.

This is going to be fun.

Course 2: Sour

Course #2 would be the "Sour" element.

Here we were treated to a sous-vide of pork neck (which apparently does not exist but butcher Ben Forbes said he had to push meat up from the shoulders to get a fatty effect on the neck), a tart apple demiglace (or 'half glaze', a sauce that is basically used for other sauces), sour grape and tomatillo escabeche (a Mediterranean dish, usually fish, that is cooked in an acidic mixture), mustard green chips, carrots, turnips and a blackberry croquant ('crisp').

This was the standout for me. All of it came together with each bite to create that perfect mouth feel and flavor and the "sour" invitation lived up to its name. It was playful, jovial and above all really yummy. Cheers to all that came together on this one.

Okay. Lets keep this hit machine on track.

Course 3: Umami

Umami is usually described as a category of flavor beyond the bitter, sweet, sour and salty that our taste buds can handle. Some say brothy or meaty. Quite the challenge for this course.

For this one, chefs offered up hog trotter and barbecue devilfish (usually a manta ray, here it was smoked octopus), chicken fried headcheese, mudbug (crawfish/crayfish depending on where you are from) dashi (Japanese cooking stock) grits, smoked roe, chicory, enoki (long thin white Asian mushroom) and some mayo.

Wow.

Complex only begins to describe what was happening here. The devilfish was rousing as I was not really used to that kind of texture or flavor, one that reminded me of a loose pate of sorts brimming with porky elements and a distinct barbecue finish. The chicken fried headcheese just made me smile as I know that was the product of chef Travis from The Parish who is no stranger to twisting traditional southern flavors and making them his subservient. The presentation reminded me of some Medieval map in which after crossing the dark sea of the devilfish you must solve the puzzle of the mysterious enoki before conquering the tower of chicken fried headcheese topped with smoked roe.

Probably because at this point the food high was beginning to seriously rear its delicious head.

Just one more course to contend with.

Dessert Course: Sweet (duh)

Sweet relief came in the form of a triage of dessert:

1) A chocolate ganache (a glaze or filling made from rich chocolate and cream) cake with cardamom cream
2) Prickly pear limoncello granita (basically an Italian icee)
3) Donut with pork floss cotton candy, bacon and ancho caramel

This was the perfect way to end an extraordinary meal.

The chocolate cake was really rich but not too sweet. If you are going to live in Tucson be prepared to love prickly pear...everything. That granita melted in your mouth and cooled the pork heavy supper down a notch. They explained why the pork floss was bright green but all I could hear was "Mmmm" echoing through my ears and brain. I'm sure there was a reason behind it.

To the chef that created it...get back to me. It looks like the mossy glen to which the headcheese tower casts shadows over, next to the perilous devilfish sea, a donut-y respite from solving the riddle of the enoki.

Is that what it is?

I hope so.

All the chefs making all the food

As we sipped on a really hearty yet subtly sweet port wine, Devon and the rest of the chefs thanked everybody involved and gave a big hand to us, the ones that attended and were privy to such an honor to be fed by the hands of Tucson's culinary Avengers.

We left, not only full, but a bit sad that this was the last in the first series of GUT dinners...at least for the summer. Since it was so busy with people, the two of us exited into the warm evening outside without saying personal 'thank yous' and 'goodbyes'.

So let this here blog post say it for me/us:

Thank you chefs for not only creating GUT but for cooking memorable meals and allowing a dork like me to be part of your fold.

All I can say about that is:

Cool!

Thank you GUT!

Camera, Typing & Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
Last Sunday in August, 2017

Metal Influence:

CARCASS

"Heartwork"

The Best Burger AND The Best Burrito In Tucson? Alright...Let's Do This.

Okay, we almost feel bad about posting this article.

We at the Tucson Homeskillet are not in the food blog game to put anybody down, smear against restaurants that we deem shameful and gross or even turn our nose up at places that make us mad because the service sucks as well as the food. If the place doesn't do it for us we just move on and focus on the stuff that does make us happy.

Yeah, we did feature what we knew to be the worst burrito in Tucson but...we didn't give out the name of the place and we never will. And, sorry, it was kind of funny.

That's sort of the case here.

Well, a lot of you have been asking if we could do this particular challenge and, yes, we did (with a heavy sigh) and to not let you down we went ahead and published the results. So without further ado, here is our take on a place that claims to have the best burger and burrito in Tucson!

(Apologies to those who know who we are talking about and more apologies to the place in particular...because you know who you are. But maybe this can be an inspiration to not ride on the results of a readers poll from years past. Just sayin'...)

Well...the chips and salsa were good, so...that's a positive

The Tucson Homeskillet has been meaning to do this piece for a while. Since winning a readers poll back in 2013 for Best Burger in Tucson, this casual Mexican concept up on Broadway also won the same poll for Best Burrito in 2015.

Best burrito and best burger in town? Now that, my friends and dear readers, is quite the boast in a city literally overflowing with amazing burritos and burgers. So on a rather hot afternoon, the Homeskillet crew rolled in to see if the food lived up to the hype.

The mole was choco-chocked and that's about it

The place itself is nice. Its clean with easy to follow instructions on how to order and a menu that is extensive without being overbearing. Thing is, it was high lunchtime on a Wednesday and the restaurant was nearly empty. Not always the best sign, especially for a eatery that is boasting the best burrito and burger in Tucson.

The best huh? Man, this establishment should be booming then. Lines out the door even. If you have huge banners outside advertising the fact that you make the ultimate burrito and burger you'd think folks would be beating at the doors and windows trying to get in.

Nope. Just us, two old ladies and an Asian man on his laptop who looked rather confused about something. Possibly his food.

We give you: The Best Burrito in Tucson!

We get to the counter and order the burger, the winner, medium rare, and the burrito, the winner's circle one as well.

Since there was three of us and two items didn't seem like enough, we also got the mole fries appetizer and the chicken flautas, because if you are a Mexican food joint and screw up flautas, you need to rethink what you're doing and just go into the pest control industry or something.

And...the best burger?

The first item up was the mole fries. Seemed like a decent enough start to the judging of the restaurant's bold claims. We love poutine and fries covered in a good spicy mole sauce sounded pretty good at the time seeing as we were all rather darn hungry.

Let's just say our stomachs were in control and definitely not the brain. Or tongue.

The mole was weird. No real flavor or spice but a definitive chocolate taste overcame the thick black gravy. It clung to the piping hot crispy fries for dear life much like caked mud on a boot. The dish just didn't make any sense. In fact, it just kind of made us sad. It was as if they melted down some Hershey's Kisses into a paste and sprinkled sesame seeds on top. Really odd and really flat.

"Maybe if I just keep powering through my tastebuds wont mind after a while," Chili said as he chomped another tarred up pile of fries.

Nope. It didn't help. So we left the bowl half consumed hoping the entrees would live up to all the hoopla.

The presentation was nice and it stopped there

The flautas were the next to arrive and, sadly, they didn't help much.

The side of rice was cooked nice and the greens were fresh, but the black beans (much like the mole) were gloppy and tedious, without any real flavor and kind of a pain to eat.

The worst though was the flautas themselves.

"Tastes like dog food," chimed She-Ra as she threw one down on the plate, laughing in spite of her spite. So I took a bite and confirmed her observation.

"Yeah," I said wincing. "This beef is terrible."

"Um, that's chicken," she reminded with a grin and grimace.

Oh yeah. Oh wow. Man, so far this place isn't doing us any proper. Oh no.

But the burrito and burger...c'mon, they have to be good, right? No...the best!

Right?

Oh, there it is...yeah, it's kind of medium rare, if you squint

Eventually the two winners of a Tucson reader's poll arrived.

The burrito looked really good and was presented nicely; cut in half and stacked on top of itself with some greens, radishes and salsa on the side. As did the burger, smothered in a chipotle aioli on a decent looking brioche bun and, yes, served with those fries. Sans mole.

But the results on the actual taste of both the (supposed) best burger and the best burrito in Tucson?

Umm...

Not good. Sorry.

Chili says: These fries put the poo in poutine

First off the burger was not cooked medium rare, not even close. It was "cooked", that we knew, but it didn't have a red center until we got deep down into it, and then only if you looked hard enough for it. The bun was okay, the chipotle aioli was fine but the meat seasoning was not all that great and at the bottom of it all was a collection of mystery "greens".

They looked a bit like watercress, didn't really have a distinct flavor but one thing was for sure they were really tough, so much it made cutting the sandwich in half quite a chore. Was it...grass? It might have been grass. Anyway, the patty was juicy enough to pass for acceptable but it was a far cry from being the best burger in Tucson. By far! Most dive bars with kitchens and old school steakhouses put this meager meat flounder to shame. A lot has changed since 2013 and the Tucson burger game is a tough one to beat. Getting people to vote for you via social media seemed to have worked once but I doubt this'll hold up against the magnitude and magnificence of the burgers we have here today.

Might be time to take that banner down.

Please let it end

But what about the burrito?

Yeah, what about it?

The first thing we got was salt. It was really salty. Packed with grilled vegetables such as corn, carrots and red onions, it was also filled with grilled chicken, rice and black beans. And...so what? That's it? That's all you got? C'mon best burrito in Tucson.

It was bland. But salty.

How can this be the best burrito...in Tucson? TUCSON! We are basically Mexico and the Mexican food here in unreal. I've had amazing burritos from small carts parked outside of gas stations, burritos ten times better than this one, one that garnered a "readers poll best of" over three years ago. There was absolutely nothing outstanding about the burrito or the burger, in any capacity. There are way, way better options out there and waiting for you.

Trust us here.

See, we went into this assignment with a bit of hope; we wanted to like the burger and we wanted to like the burrito. A small family run establishment beaming about how they hold the trophy for best burger and best burrito in Tucson? Great! Let's see what you got.

Unfortunately we had to stop what we were doing and just call it a day. This challenge was a bit of a fail, so we left a bit grumpy, a little hungry, and crawled into the oven like car to try and find some immediate salvation.

Sorry little place up on Broadway but the Tucson Homeskillet didn't like your food. And good luck with holding onto the "Best Of" votes for that burger and burrito. We just...yeah.

Sorry.

It says John on my shirt and that's where this food belongs

Anyway, our salvation came in a large icy goblet filled with rum, gin, brandy and lots of fruit juices from a dark and cool lounge just up the street. The Scorpion Bowl at Kon Tiki put us back in order and put smiles back on our faces.

Huh...and the food here is good too. Did you know that?

But that is another story all together.

Cheers!

This goblet of firewater made the bad man go away...temporarily

Camera, Typing and (unfortunately) Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
Early June, 2016

Metal Influence:

REPULSION

"Horrified"