"Wait...That Tiki Bar On Broadway Serves Food! Really? I Didn't Know That."

You probably haven't been here since college. But...you know this place.

Kon Tiki.

Yeah, that Polynesian themed island getaway bar that serves up some serious drinks in kitchy goblets and steins up on Broadway and Swan. You know, Kon Tiki. Remember? You 'member.

In college you most likely came here because the drinks were huge and strong and they had a happy hour that dished out some free grub. You were young, you were broke, you wanted to get faced so this was the place you probably ended up in.

Right?

Probably.

The free happy hour buffet...um, thanks but no thanks, although the meatballs were good

But now you're all grown up and you haven't been back since you graduated. You have a real adult job, you drink real adult drinks, you eat at real adult places with white linen set tables or tolerate locations that have jungle gyms and Whack-A-Moles for your kids to play with as you talk about adult things with your adult friends as you sip those adult drinks.

Why should you go back to Kon Tiki after all these years? That's, like...college era you. Right?

So why a feature on Kon Tiki, a bar most Tucson residents have been to at least once, be it voluntarily or talked into by ne'er-do-well roommates?

Uh...because of the food, dude. It's good.

Real good.

Real adults drinking, um...well they're drinking all right

Honestly, we kind of forgot about Kon Tiki too and the fact that they actually served food there. No, seriously.

A few years back, when the Homeskillet was just a once in a while / if we felt like posting 'blog lite', we did a feature on Kon Tiki as part of a short lived series where we buy a Groupon for random places, eat there and talk about it. We did like one or two, maybe three, Groupon article things then just moved on, or forgot about doing it all together. Anyway, even back then we were all "Oh yeah, the food here is great."

So you're probably reading this going, "C'mon, the food can't be that good. Kon Tiki?  It's a weird drunky bar and that buffet kind of sucks. Even if it is free."

Work with us here people.

Monkeys On A Stick, a classic and oh so tasty

True. The gratis fare isn't the subject here. That happy hour buffet is just free vittles for folks that need a bit of a buffer when it comes to quaffing much of their hell grog and it's cool that they do it in the first place. Its just chips, veggies, some dip...stuff like that. But they do put out some of their BBQ meatballs and those are pretty tight. Honestly its just some bits of bites, cheap as free, to keep you going and that's that.

No, you gotta order off the real food menu here kids. Trust us.

Okay, look...check this out.

Hawaiian fish tacos...just like the god Tangaroa used to make

If you can recall Homeskilleteers, a few weeks back we ended up eating the self-proclaimed "Best Burger and Burrito in Tucson"...and they sucked. So bad in fact that we needed booze immediately. Just a few blocks up was Kon Tiki, so we got ourselves a large vessel filled with all of the alcohol and some well needed tasty food.

"Oh wow," we all sort of said as we bit into our nibbles. "The food here is good. Maybe we should write about it."

Um...okay.

And here we go!

The Loko Moko, a delicious burger with an egg on it...so tropical!

So in true Tucson Homeskillet fashion we gathered up some of our closest and bravest friends and decided to order, oh, one of each from the menu.

Both the drink and food menu. C'mon, what else would you expect?

Anyway, here are the results:

JB looking concerned as Rizz slurps down another sacrificial mind drink

First, yeah, the drinks were really strong, as expected. Probably just as strong as when Kon Tiki first opened in the '60s and when you used to come here with a fake I.D. once finals were over with.

We got something called the Pele, named after the pissed off goddess of volcanoes and, boy howdy, did that thing live up to its name. Fiery, powerful and sort of lava like as it went down the gullet. Another called the 'Greenpeace' which felt like washing down a fine lawn mulch but with a distinct fruity alcohol kick to the cajones. Then there was the Fog Cutter, something called Lights Out, the Creepy Tiki, Maiden's Downfall and so forth, all of which did not list ingredients (which is probably for the best) but instead came equipped with brief descriptions of just how you might feel after you finish one:

"If strength you need, drink and it shall be granted!"

"Virgins beware!"

"The original drink was intended for a sacred ceremony until some white man found the recipe!"

Stuff like that. You get the picture.

Moa Nui chicken in coconut sauce...amazing

The crew was getting a bit tipsy but then the plethora of food arrived.

The ton of appetizers was daunting, but oh so delicious. The egg rolls were deep fried yet filled with a garden of vegetables and served with a mighty teriyaki and a sweet and sour sauce so there was a fun balance between decadent and sort of, kind of, "healthy". The BBQ ribs were hearty and sticky and fall off the bone tender. We got our pot stickers steamed which counter balanced the amount of weighty fare that was spread before us. Really good, stuffed full of savory pork with a good chew to the dumpling casing.

Then, of course, there was the classic: The Monkeys on a Stick. Tender, marinated bites of perfectly cooked medium rare steak served mini kebab style. This is essentially what saved us after eating crap food just a few blocks away. Accompanied with a stout viscid dipping sauce this dish is what you need on a daily basis.

So good.

Angry volcano deity sized pile o' rings

As people were queuing up for the free fare at the buffet, we were getting looks from all sorts; bug eyed at the amount of food we had on the table.

"Wait, they serve food here?", I overheard a portly guy ask his doppelganger wife as they glooped ranch dressing on mini carrots and ruffly potato chips atop their drooping paper plates.

Well, we hate to say it buffet jockeys, but you are officially eating food here, so, yes, they do serve "food". But if you mean like burgers, steaks, ribs, shrimp and lobster tails? Yes. Yes, Kon Tiki serves food.

And not just any kind of food, really tasty food with a distinct tropical influence.

So what are you waiting for? Do what we did and dive in!

Possibly some of the best egg rolls in town

The Loko Moko is a half pound burger of good ground beef, seasoned and cooked to order with a nice runny egg on top; it was really hefty, juicy and delicious.

There was also an order of fantastic fish tacos that were tangy and flaky with a crisp slaw and finished with a spicy aioli drizzled over. The house club sandwich could feed about three people but one of us took it down in no time flat. Piled high and served with piping hot fries, this one made us want to join whatever club they had going on, one where we would look like that Israel Kamakawiwo'ole guy in no time flat if we kept eating the way we were.

In fact, all of the plates were generous and all of it really yummy.

No really.

Jana happy/nervous about the size of her chef salad

More drinks, more food, more weird looks from bar patrons.

There was ten of us, but the feast on our tables mashed together looked as if we were on some sort of medieval gorge feast, one that would encourage many trips to the vomitorium so we can continue with the eat-a-thon.

"What did you order?"

"Oh, this is the Moa Nui."

"What's that?"

"It's, uh, a big chicken breast served with this amazing coconut sauce with a side of perfectly cooked rice and a ton of seasoned grilled vegetables."

"Good?"

*not responding because of shoveling more food in face*

The Tucson Homeskillet eating all of the foods

Alright, here is where we have to give some kind of critique.

Our server was amazing, but she was the only one on the floor so sometimes our orders took a bit longer than expected. Big whoop, it happens.

But here's the clincher:

Kon Tiki does not have a modern computer POS ticket service, something that like 90% of busy establishments utilize because, oh, we don't know, it's the 21st century and efficiency is as easy as pushing a few buttons. Sure it might cost a few extra (thousand) dollars but in the end it is so worth it. Our poor but awesome server had to divvy up the five separate checks BY HAND, doing the math, tax and all that using her brain and a small calculator, all the while juggling other demanding tables. So, yeah, we had to wait a while for the bills to arrive seeing as the place was jumping but not totally full and chaotic...enough to keep her very busy let's just say. It wasn't a big problem with us because we ordered more drinks straight from the bar and we were happy to do so, but if this was a table of people that didn't know how hard it is to be a server in a busy restaurant or empathize with a young person, probably in their like first or second job, ever, doing all they can to make things right, it could have gotten ugly.

So, Kon Tiki, this is the Tucson Homeskillet advising you to get a POS system for your servers. It'll make it easier on them, on you in the long run and you'll thank us and your patrons will thank you because of this.

You're welcome.

Metal Mark just had to get in on Jack and Chili's third Scorpion Bowl

Other than that, yes...Kon Tiki serves food. Not just bobbles of celery and broken pretzel fingers on the buffet table, but real authentic and fantastic food.

When you were going to the U of A you probably ate nothing but ramen or crap corporate pizza when you scored a coupon from the bookstore and, at the time, couldn't afford the "adult" prices from the Kon Tiki menu. Not that we're saying Kon Tiki is pricey, oh no, not even close, but when you are 19 with nothing but loose change in your pocket and school debt piling up, a $12 steak might as well be a Bugatti sports car. Thing is, you can't eat a Bugatti sports car. So...where's the fun in that?

Yeah. We don't know either.

Now you know, you gotta go

Now that you are all grow'd up and adulting like a mofo, you should go back to ye olde stomping grounds of Kon Tiki, get yourself a proper drink and order up some really grand food. It's fun, it's local, it's kind of a Tucson tradition and most importantly it's really scrumptious.

Unless you're still in college and are broke as all living heck so you just might have to wait a while. If you ask us we suggest dropping out of school, selling all of your text books and then just blowing it all on a drink and food fest at Kon Tiki. If you do decide to do this, just call us up and we'll show you how its done.

Just kidding. Stay in school kids.

Forget that. Have you had the Mahi-Mahi here? Oh my gosh, so good.

Whatever. You're an adult, you make the decision. But if we were you, we'd just eat Monkey Sticks all day and drink Zombies till we start walking like one. That, of course, is up to you.

Uh huh. Just what we thought.

See you here...

Thanks Kon Tiki!

Camera, Typing and Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
At the Summer Solstice, 2016

Metal Influence: 

GRUESOME

"Savage Land"

Trident II : Eclectic Food n Booze!

We were first hipped to the Trident Grill not long after moving here to Tucson in 2006. It was at the very edge of football season, perhaps even in pre-season, and my Redskins fan friend had only one destination in mind for the game. Yep, you guessed it, the Trident Grill.

"You're going to love this place," he said rather enthusiastically as we exited the car and approached the front door. "Food is off the chain. And if your a 'Skins fan like I am this is the best place to catch a game."

We walked in and, boy, he wasn't kidding. Redskins jerseys and hats were adorned by at least 80% of the customers in the tightly packed open space. It was so busy that we almost bounced but a friendly server assured us there was space so we stuck with the original plan and stayed. Somehow we found a bit of standing room only close to the bar, ordered a couple of pints and then moved our attention to one of the various big screens showing the game. Not too sure who the Redskins were playing (the Vikings maybe?, dude, this was like almost ten years ago!) but the dedicated crowd were in a fervor with almost every play and pass.

Now, at the time, I wasn't much of a football fan, so after the first quarter I became not that interested in the game and decided that I was a bit hungry. I asked a server for a menu and when it arrived it was pretty impressive if not intimidating. 

A road sign for sore eyes

Back then the menu was really big, like food option big. Mainly focused on seafood items, the list of dishes ranged from small bites, bar food to beefy sandwiches and, of course, really massive offerings from the sea, but, like, a lot. This was the kind of menu you'd see in a space twice if not more so larger. When I glanced up towards the kitchen area I saw that it was a cramped space in the back of the restaurant with three to four guys moving, like running to get orders out on time. With a menu this packed in a space this tight I was hesitant to order anything at all. Looking closer, the dupes up on the line were at least twenty in so I made a mental note to come back later when it wasn't game time and order some food.

So I drank more beer and watched the game with my friend.

Then the Redskins lost. My friend was sad as were most of the patrons. Some got mad.

It happens.

Always a smiling face at the Trident II bar

When I finally got a chance to go back to the Trident to actually eat their food, I was a bit shocked to find out their menu had changed. It was scaled down, it was on a one sheet laminate and the prices matched the options much easier than the first time I was there. It became pretty clear that after a few Redskins games with a rather "ambitious" menu for such a mid sized area they had to meet the reality that a cramped line with a few guys on top of each other can't really bash out a Cheesecake Factory sized menu.

Okay, maybe it wasn't that big but...it was pretty imposing.

We got some crab cakes and calamari. Delicious. Very tasty, fresh and cooked to perfection. Then I think I got the Wildcat Burger, which came equipped with bacon, cheddar cheese, onion rings and the house hot bar-be-que sauce. Amazing. She-Ra got the clam chowder which was some of the best she or I have had in quite some time. It was actually nice to say the food was well worth the wait.

Oh and don't forget about the beers. Those are good too.

Trident II bartenders workin' it

It was settled then. We became regulars. Great happy hour specials, good food, awesome service, interesting beers on tap...who wouldn't be?

Then sometime in late 2015 word got out in the Tucson culinary underbelly, that owner Nelson Miller and his staff were considering opening up a new Trident Grill, possibly in the Plaza Palomino where the old Jackson Tavern used to be. Pretty soon those rumors became true as construction began right across the way from Vero Amore. In fact, if you read my haphazard escapade during the Super Bowl, that was the first time I laid eyes on the facade, which was to be called, cleverly enough: Trident II.

Trident II...I like that. I mean, some of my favorite movies are sequels, so why not just put a "Part 2" next to the original money making name? "The Empire Strikes Back"? Better than the original. "Hellboy 2"? Far superior to the first. And let's not forget, the only reason they made "Grease" is that they could make "Grease 2". No, really, I swear.

And then, after all the rumors slowly became reality and then seeing it come to life, Trident II finally opened in early 2016. Immediately I knew I had to write about it for the Homeskillet. It just seemed like too much awesome to pass up.

Nothing like good company on a beautiful day on their open patio

So on a lovely early spring afternoon I made my way to the now open Trident II only to find it just as bumpin' and packed as the original down by the U of A. Luckily I had a chance to hang out with manager Danny Gallego, who was very busy juggling issues between the bar and kitchen, and even in the really early stages of the new restaurant being open, he explained to me the reasons for expansion and the challenges that come with it.

"Well if you ever tried to dine at the original Trident Grill on any U of A game, be it home or away, you find it hard to get a seat," Danny explains with a shrug and smile. "As staff we do what we can to accommodate everyone but that is a mid-sized restaurant at best and can only hold so much. So we felt as a team that this location on Swan would be well received by all the surrounding neighborhoods and the traffic here, which there is plenty of, could create the volume of customers that is needed."

I'm always a sucker for a perfectly poured IPA

Sure the original Trident is a success and by the head count in it's sister/brother store, they are well on their way to even more progress. Yet in the early trials of a new venture there are always obstacles and hurdles that out even seasoned restaurant workers to the test.

"Everything is a challenge," notes Danny trying to maintain the crowd during a busy happy hour, "some are lessons learned and some not so much. Every restaurant owner has a plan in their head how everything will fall into place once the dust settles and the construction is done. Things out of your control pop up out of nowhere! Such as kitchen equipment working fine then suddenly shutting down right before service. Luckily you have the tools and knowledge to troubleshoot the problem if your tech guy is off skiing in Colorado when the POS (point of sale, the tickets you see streaming out of little black machines at the bar or on the line) system just decides to stop operating."

Trident II culinary team doing work

Okay, so we get that running a busy restaurant is tough work, but now for the fun stuff: The food!

Me personally am a fan of most of the items on the menu. No really, I haven't had a bad meal once, be it just a snack or a full on rager of an eat-fest. Now, I have my favorites but I just had to ask what Danny's favorite menu item was.

"Oh man," he says clapping his hands and leaning his head back as if dreaming. "Hands down the Maryland crab cakes. Unbelievable. One of our kitchen guys, Jason, is so creative. He comes up with the most outrageous food. We are so lucky to have a really talented kitchen staff like we do. Those guys earn their stripes!"

Delicious food waiting to be delivered to lucky patrons

"I wouldn't say what we are doing here 'separates' us from the original that owner Nelson (Miller) started almost fifteen years ago, but more of a 'continuation'", states Danny when I asked about the concept of Trident II and whats contrastive from the original. "Right now I'd have to say the location would have to be the obvious answer.

"We as a company consider all of our patrons family and that, right there, is what really separates us from most other restaurants. I mean, look at this," extending his hands to the throng of people seated or waiting to be. "This...this is a lot of family!"

Happy Hour in full effect

Seeing the amount of flurry on the floor and in the kitchen, servers constantly coming up and asking questions and an unexpected 12 top just showing up with no notice, I knew Danny had to get back to work so I just had to know one thing:

What is he looking forward to in the near future.

It didn't take him long to answer as he beamed saying, "Oh man, I am really looking forward to the warmer months coming up. Our patio is completely shaded after 10am and with these big ol' fans we got installed and going on here, it just might create the perfect environment to sit back, enjoy the day with a tall icy beer without getting scorched by the sun.

"We just want to create the same experience as the original and just feed off of our successes. It's funny, you'd be surprised at how many people here at the new location have never even heard about the original down on Speedway. But, hey...big shout to all Team Trident. Because of the success of the original that's why we've had the fortune to open Trident II!"

With that, Danny was whisked away by his team in need as the happy hour was winding down and the dinner rush was about to commence. Success indeed...

Just start from the left and keep moving

Feeling like Frogger in the middle of a busy highway trying to take pictures, I assessed that I had gotten what I needed, finished my beer and took off. Just like the first time at the original Trident, just as busy and lively as that initial visit, I told myself that I would be back to, yes, eat the food. Have you had their charcuterie boards, dubbed "Nelson's Love Plate"? Oh yeah, I'm gonna need some of that soon.

For now I felt the love of everyone at Trident II and know that even further prosperity is headed their way.

Just don't go back to those huge silly menus. You're doing fine now. Just...fine.

Thanks Team Trident II. Like I said before, sometimes sequels are better than the original. Not that...the first...you know...it's just that...um...

You know what I'm trying to say, right? Okay.

Cool.

The staff was having just as much fun as we were

Camera and Typing
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
Early/Mid March, 2016

Metal Influence:

MASTODON

"Leviathan"

A Grand Day Out With The Tucson Homeskillet!

The wife has been out of town for almost a month and I really haven't left the house since she left. It's odd. Being joined at the hip like we are, when she goes to train new bartenders in various locations across the US, maybe once twice a year for a few weeks, my first inclination is to get a bunch of stuff accomplished. The reality of it all is the first week she's gone I live in almost silence and seclusion. I love her more than anything but she can be quite the tornado of clothes anywhere and everywhere, towels strewn about, shoes left in the middle of walkways and lord almighty if I can't just get a corner of the comforter when she literally coils herself up in a blanket ball from her night spinning much like a thrill seeker barrel rolling down a steep hill.

So the first week I clean the house knowing it will stay clean, take as many naps as possible, listen to Metal at top volumes alongside not saying a word and just enjoying the tinkling of garden chimes and the cat purring. Around the second week I start watching movies and shows I wanna watch and possibly have one too many to drink at night as trying to sleep without struggling for a bit of sheet only makes the bed feel empty and the house somehow bigger and darker. The third week I sort of get into this groove of "being alone" and before you know it she's back and all is right with the world. Well, our little world anyway.

The Wednesday (my one true day off during the week) before she returns, I decided to make a journey of it. Getting inspired by Wallace and Gromit and their "Grand Day Out" where they go to the moon to get more cheese and then are accosted by a skiing enthusiast robot oven, I too wanted to eat and do something around Tucson that I have been meaning to get on with. So I made a list, set a course and when I woke up at the crack of noon I got in the car and began my adventure. So here are the results of a most recent Homeskillet outing.

Was it grand? Some points. But a few snags only made a beautiful late winter afternoon as close to perfect as one could hope for.

Here we go...

Stilton? Wensleydale? 

First stop was a new taco place right down the street from my house and it is called:

El Berraco

2960 N. First Ave.

What used to be El Mezon del Cobre (a fine place to eat and grab some beers while we did laundry next door at this little wash shack called Dean's Village Laundromat) is now a nautical themed Mexican food establishment that boasts some of the best and most inventive seafood fare in the neighborhood, if not the city. I mean, the outside is built to look like a submarine and when you walk through the port like doors, you enter a fairly dark and blue hued underwater themed submersible bar and restaurant, one that you might find in some overpriced water park.

It was late afternoon so the lunch rush had already come and gone. Sure there were a few people in there but when I was sat at one of their large tables in the middle of the action, I had a feeling that I was in for something good.

In the center of the long plank-like table are a bevvy of various hot sauces and along the curved walls large flat screens display the specialties of the house all keeping with the undersea motif. This place is pretty cool.

The massive Chile Relleno Taco

Scanning the menu, I instantly became a bit weary of the prices. Tacos and tostadas ranged in price from $8 to $20. For a taco? In Tucson? So I asked my server what the portions were like and with a gesture of his hands as if he were holding a football, he assured me that the food here was very generous.

"Trust me," he said with a smile, "they are like no taco you have had before."

So I ordered a taco and a tostada. He then looked at me and asked "For...just you?" This made me nervous. Did I order too much?  The tone of his voice indicated that perhaps my appetite wasn't as big as the food here. I then assured him that I "just wanted to try a good variety" and, yes, I will need a to go box. But I was so hungry I knew that I could devour all the food I just ordered. It couldn't be that big...could it?

First up was some chips and salsa but....this wasn't your average free dippin' sauce you expect in a Mexican food joint. This wasn't made with tomatoes, but rather tropical fruit, peppers and, get this, soy sauce. I had to ask because when I dunked my chip into it and took a bite I was overtaken by flavor. Simple, beautiful, fresh and imaginative. Seeing my pleasure of just sampling the salsa, he kept bringing out more for me to try. Each one was wholly different and textural from the next. Some hot, some thin, some bright, some dense but all delicious.

Soon my first item arrived. It was the Chile Relleno taco which was described as a jalapeno filled with cheese and shrimp, topped with a cabbage salad, cilantro guacamole with a creamy chipotle dressing and pickled onions. Upon first view of it, yes, my server was right, this is a very shareable taco. It was big. But I braved the sheer mass of it all and dug it.

Glorious. Absolutely filled with layers of flavor, balance of heat, crunch, savory and creamy that all came together in a wonderful array. He was right, I hadn't had a taco like this before.

Then came the tostada.

La Berraca tostada, bask in all of its glory

The La Berraca tostada features salmon, shrimp and scallops on thick warm corn tortillas in a sea of ranchero essence sauce. Now, I haven't had thick corn tortillas like this since my time living in southern California or various trips to Baja. Everything about this dish was amazing. So fresh, so clean and so considered and thought about. At this point I began to get a little light headed from all that was going on in my mouth and stomach but I trudged on and actually finished the La Berraca tostada. But between the thickness of the Chile Relleno taco, the chips and the samples of salsas and the fact that I still had a full day ahead of me, I did indeed ask for a box for the remaining taco. Note to all readers: always trust your server!

El Berraca is new but is easily on it's way to becoming a food destination here in Tucson. Owned by the same team that runs the BK franchise, this place is now something that I treasure and fear in my neighborhood. Treasure because...oh my god! Fear because...oh my god, am I eating here again? Like I need a taco habit to aid in my already expanding middle. Whatever.

When I left I was so elated that I considered going up a few blocks to the house, cuddle up with the cat and take a nap. But...no. I still had four more places to go so off I went.

The next food destination was:

Hopyard Deli

210 N. 4th Ave.

I've been wanting to try this deli ever since going to Ermano's next door but never stepped foot in there even though its open later than most delis. Now, if you've read other Homeskillet posts you know how deli obsessed I am. Seeing how rare it is to get me to come down to 4th Ave, or even downtown, I thought the Hopyard Deli must be awesome because the decent reviews and accolades are coming in from all sides. 

Well, I must have caught them on an off day. 

It was late afternoon and the place was empty. It was nice, clean, seemed like a great location to stop in for a soda and sandwich but there was nobody there. Like...nobody. Not even an employee behind the counter. I couldn't even hear anybody prepping or cleaning or...anything. So I looked around, decided to get some pastrami to go and then waited. 

And waited. 

Maybe it was self service, I don't know. After about ten minutes or so of just standing there and looking into the cameras hoping someone would see me, two teenage kids slowly emerged from the back and just sat on a table checking their phone. I had to ask, "Uh, do you work here?" The girl with the blonde dreads and stoned eyes walked behind the counter and just looked at me. The other dude in the Bonnaroo t-shirt just sat there not even acknowledging anything. So I hesitantly ordered some pastrami, which seemed like an absolute chore for her, then the dude slid off the table, rang up my order and had problems running my card because the iPhone thing was "acting all stupid". What should have taken a minute or two was like a twenty minute ordeal. Plus it was getting close to 4pm and I didn't want to be late for my next appointment, which started at exactly 4 and if you don't get there on time...the merchandise goes quick. 

In silence and non appreciation, I was handed my stack of cut meat and I dashed out the door to my next destination. 

Thanks Hopyard, now I know: Just stick to the Sausage Shop and all will be well. 

Plus the pastrami was bullcrap.

Meh

Well, after that disappointing venture, I was off to my next annex, one that I know will not let me down, because the third spot belonged to:

Barrio Bread

Various Locations (This one came from the Tucson CSA, 300 E. University in the Historic Y courtyard)

No, I did not take this picture, thanks to the good person who did

When I re-started the Tucson Homeskillet almost two years ago and totally immersed myself in the local food scene, one of the first people to friend me and who I started to follow back was Don Guerra. This alchemist of local grains and flour creates some of the tastiest bread I have ever had the privilege to put in my mouth. Working out of his garage, Don is a one man flurry of baking, spawning delicious loaf after delicious loaf and sells his wares across Tucson at random locales, usually schools and community areas.

On this particular Wednesday, he happened to have a stand set up at the Community Supported Agriculture center courtyard on University Avenue.

Pain Epi and Au Levain, in repose

I got there at exactly 4pm and there was already a line. After staking my place in the que while checking out the amazing goods for sale, I had a horrible thought: Barrio  Bread only takes cash on outings like this, and I hadn't been to an ATM in quite some time.

Crap. Thing is, I rarely carry actual money with me, so I dug out my wallet and opened it up, praying I had at least a few bucks. Luckily there was a 10 in there...whew. Not enough to buy one of each but at least to grab two of my favorites, the the Pain Epi baguette and the au Levain loaf.

What can I say, if you have never experienced what real bread tastes like, you have no idea. Follow Barrio Bread online and track them/him down. Authentic bread is honestly one of my favorite things to eat. You think it's so simple, and, in reality, it is, but it is so much more. So complex, a living thing that is nearly almost all air, but it's science so... I hate to use this word, but the flavor is transcendent. Yes...I said "transcendent".

After the disappointment from the deli, the two loaves I was lucky to get made up for it. Just the smell alone made me woozy. And when I bit into the pain epi I honestly drooled a bit on myself. Which was funny because I wasn't even hungry. Those tacos from El Berraco were still doing their job which made my next destination a bit questionable.

Real bread is so Metal

To experience their happy hour cocktails and food, my fourth location was intended to be:

Pasco Kitchen & Lounge

820 E. University

I'm sure the drinks and food were good but...

Here's the thing: I didn't get a chance to grab a drink or any food. Pasco at 4:30pm on a random Wednesday in February was PACKED. For real, there was absolutely no room at the bar, the patio was way over crowded (I mean, it was a splendiferously beautiful day so that was no surprise) and although there was a table or two open, I felt weird being alone in that sort of upscale environment, me in grubby shorts and tattered Vans, among the late afternoon scenesters and purveyors of lunchtime gossip and wine pairings.

So...I split. But I told myself I would return, hopefully with a partner and probably not as sweaty and still bloaty from the taco apocalypse I had just endured.

Sorry Pasco, but good on you! Congrats on the success. I mean, the food looked good and the cocktails appeared inviting. Hopefully next time.

Anyway, at this point my daytime adventure was winding down and I was really craving a drink. Luckily my final stop was a bar, a bar in a video store no doubt. That's right, I finally hauled my lazy butt over to:

Casa Video Film Bar

2905 E. Speedway

The day was growing pretty warm, I had been driving and walking across a good portion of the city and I was so ready for a little respite and a cold beverage to ease me into the evening. Luckily when I walked into Casa Video's beer and coffee bar I was very pleased to find it full of places to sit and was gloriously air conditioned. Not too sure why it took me so long to check this place out but...I was glad I finally did.

Beer and a movie? Um, yes please!

Their beer selection was great, covering not just Arizona breweries but many others from the Pacific and Southwest. And there was a movie playing on the various flatscreens, Badlands, a movie I hadn't seen since I was a kid. This was great, just what I needed to end my grand day out.

The bar is set up really nice too. Not only do they have fantastic beer on tap but also microbrews in bottles for sale as well. Plus they are a full service coffee bar to boot. The other bodies in the place were drinking fresh brewed coffee, but not me. I needed an ice cold beer. And I got one. An IPA from a brewery up in Flagstaff. After grabbing my frosty glass filled with golden hued goodness, I took a seat on a comfy red chair near a viewing screen and sighed deep.

To quote Ice Cube: Today was a good day.

The beer was amazing; citrusy, hoppy, balanced and, most important, very cold and a bit strong. Folks from the regular video store area would wander in to access the second floor area seeing as the only way there was through the bar. I watched Martin Sheen and a very young Sissy Spacek kill people across the acrid space of South Dakota while quaffing a delicious ale made a few hundred miles up a ways as kids munched on popcorn before ascending the stairs to select a fine foreign film or exploitation movie whilst on a cozy chair hiding from the beating sun and after work traffic outside.

Everyone should have days like this. It makes you really appreciate the city you live in. When I was a resident of San Francisco for over 12 years I would do a "discover your city" tour at least once a month. Sometimes just jumping on a train and getting off at some random neighborhood and walking around to see what you could find. Tucson is no different. I mean, our "train" only goes a few blocks here and there but, you get what I am getting at here.

And, to quote Calvin and Hobbes: There's treasure everywhere!

Perfect way to end a fun day

Sure, the deli was a flop (like I said, I probably caught it on a not so awesome day) and Pasco was filled to capacity but...still. I set out to do what I had planned to do and when I went home to think about dinner and call my wife I was greeted with the fuzzy face of our cat, laying in a box and looking at me with "so when do I get a treat?" eyes. Days like this are indeed rare but when things come together, you need to just lean back and appreciate the awesomeness of the town you live in.

Thank you Tucson. We shall meet again on another excursion like this.

And then you lucky kids get to read all about it.

How grand is that?

Lil' Poundcake...you my only friend

Camera and Typing
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
Late February, 2016

Metal Influence:

DEATH ANGEL

"Seemingly Endless Time"