Teetering Toward Great, Flirting With Disaster

Being a food writer and blogger in Tucson means that you eat a lot of tacos. You see, I am totally fine with this. Because of that reason I love what I do both in print and online and when a new Mexican place opens up you better believe the Homeskillet crew will be there to sample yon wares of deliciousness.

Here's the thing: Sometimes you can burn out on a style of food. Its easy, especially when you're in the food writing biz. Like, for example, I am totally in love with pastrami sandwiches but if I ate those mofos 3 - 4 days a week on a fairly regular basis I'd change my last meal option if I was to be sent to the electric chair from a #19 from Langers Deli to, oh, I don't care...anything but really.

How are Hot Pockets? Are they tasty?

Fortunately it had been a while since we stepped foot in a proper Mexican food joint so when we were in the neighborhood of Calle Tepa we slammed on the brakes and prepared ourselves for some serious southern border street food.

The place is colorful, we'll say that much

In a shopping strip on Broadway just off of Wilmot, wedged between a Panera Bread and Breugger's Bagels, is a lively spot owned by the wife of the guy that opened up the Guadalajara string of restaurants. The pedigree is there, the financial backing is obviously happening...so this place must be awesome.

Right?

Checking online reviews, Calle Tepa is pretty much 3 -5 stars across the board. First off, we were hungry. Second, we were now excited because of the internet hype. With over 400 people essentially praising this place we wondered why we hadn't visited it sooner.

Oh yeah. There's like 1,000+ other Mexican food stands here in Tucson.

That's probably why.

Chips were tasty and the salsas were really good

When we walked in we were immediately taken with how colorful the space was. The wall to your left is a vibrant mural of their menu with fairly standard fare without being too extensive which is what we like. When restaurants get too bold with their options we tend to get flummoxed, flummoxed we tell you!, and eventually end up ordering something safe just to get it over with.

The last time we were at that Cheesecake place their menu was like a frikkin tome of ancient wisdom and long sagas of battles and mythology...except with elephantine portions of extreme shrimp popper alfredo colon blocker bombs and "salads" that boasted more sodium and fat grams than a dozen burger options from Lindy's.

Way, way too big.

Still, even with the fairly tight menu, we were new and just wanted some staples: A couple of street tacos, mini-chimichangas and some ceviche along with the requisite chips and salsa.

They gave us a number, we took a seat next to a window and we waited while nibbling on their crunchy chips and really flavorful salsas under star shaped lights next to a large family that seemed quite happy to be there.

Hopefully, we would be too.

Big tacos, little flavor

For the tacos we got the carne asada, chicken adobada and the chili verde.

These things were big. And if by "street taco" you must mean a 10 lane Los Angeles highway because most street tacos we have come across are lil' bites of savory perfection, ones that easily fit in your hand so you can be on your way without that rumbly in your tumbly.

These, unfortunately, just didn't really do anything for us.

The carne asada was fine but was a bit over cooked and really didn't have any seasoning. The chicken adobada, which is normally a spicy red BBQ sauce, was nice but did not deliver any heat or much flavor. And the chili verde, slow roasted pork in a green sauce of jalapenos, garlic and tomatillos, was just kind of drippy and bland.

Crap.

I mean, it was late in the afternoon, well after the lunch rush, so maybe they were understaffed and weren't really paying attention to what they were doing as preparation for dinner was the focus at that time.

Still.

Okay, well we also had some mini chimis to contend with and a big bowl of ceviche waiting for us.

Let's hope these work out for the better.

Mini chimis that were not so mini

Just like the street tacos, the "mini" chimichangas were anything but. More like small-ish deep fried burritos or extra large Mexican eggrolls.

These things we liked, mainly because they were simple and paired well with a selection from the salsa bar. The chicken was cooked perfectly and the fry on the tortillas was crispy and golden. They came equipped with some decent guacamole and we were happy that these guys hit the mark and hit the spot as well.

Sadly, the salsa and the chimis would prove to be the highlight.

Thanks to so many online suggestions on ordering their ceviche, we were really bummed that this dish sank on so many levels.

The fish was chewy and flabby, the broth lacked citrus and spice - it just sort of sat there surrounding the tilapia, tomatoes and onion with no real rhyme or reason. This sucked. Man, we hate to come down on places but unfortunately our experience at Calle Tepa was anything but awesome.

And it helps to be awesome in this current culinary climate here in Tucson. Because we can get tacos, chimis and ceviche almost anywhere, most likely better quality too. There was just nothing about Calle Tepa to make us go "Wow, we seriously need to go back there."

We went. We ate. Eh.

If you guys have eaten there and think we are daft for not loving them then send us a message imploring to give them a second chance. Otherwise there are the other 999+ Mexican food stops here that we need to try and want to come back to.

Also, if we can be honest here for a moment: We're not huge fans of the Guadalajara restaurants.

Just saying.

Sorry about it...

About the ceviche...you see...um...well...

Typing, Camera and Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
A Bit Past St. Patrick's Day, 2017

Metal Influence:

SUICIDAL TENDENCIES

"You Can't Bring Me Down"

The Pizza Is Strong With This One

Yes, another pizza concept in Tucson. Yes.

All we can say about that is...yes!

We've said it before and we will continue to say it: We are totally fine with pizza places opening up here. How can you go wrong with another pizza joint? Oh wait, yeah, there are actually a LOT of spots that serve "whatever" slices and pies so when one pops up that entices, delights and even surprises, all we can say about that is...

"Whew!"

But what we are talking about here is not exactly a spot, or a joint, nor brick n' mortar, or...

We'll stop there.

No, what we got here is a completely mobile pizza station and all we can say about it is a resounding:

Yes.

The maestro, Luke Smith

Luke's Neapolitan Pizza and Catering is new to the pizza block but the chef and owner is far from being green around the ears, or crust. Luke Smith was once involved, and helped get off the ground, a popular and successful "food truck" business, Fiamme, which is now a standalone at the corner of Swan and Sunrise and is doing very well.

Luke and his former business partner did not see things the way that two should when pushing a concept into the tasty stratosphere, attempting to bring them to glorious heights, so Luke split and actually left the pizza biz for quite some time to rethink what he wanted to do with his young life.

After a bit of knocking around here and there and even taking some bland job in order to pay the bills, Luke realized that he had a talent and passion for all things savory and wood fired and made a very important decision. So with a bit of luck along with some financial negotiations, he got back on the pizza wagon and began to build, well...a pizza wagon.

And all anyone can say about this is: You made the right choice.

Hand made deliciousness

Now that his former partner is nestled into a cozy spot, Luke knew that operating a mobile pizzaria would be something special here in Tucson, especially the style that he is most accustomed to making. Neapolitan pizza is essentially what pizza really is, how it got started, from a region of Italy usually associated with gangsters.

It is a thin crust made from simple dough ingredients and topped with a minimal of sauce, sprinkling of cheese and perhaps a cured meat or roasted vegetable here and there. Thrown into a well heated wood fired oven that can reach temperatures of 800 degrees, these magnificent discs of supple flavor are meant to be enjoyed for the quality of ingredients and not the sheer amount of salty messes and glop that seem to permeate so many "pizzas" that we have grown comfortable with.

Sure Luke can make you a pizza with extra sausage, extra cheese and extra sauce, but it wont be the same as his other perfected creations and just might fall off the finely charred crust and fall into your lap and your date will be all "Dude, you got pizza crotch" before taking off and leaving you there with hot drippy (yet delicious) chaos starting to seep into your underwear.

Trust the maestro here. Luke's pizzas are fantastic so leave the heavy handed muck to the corporate chains that insert hot dogs into their crust.

We know what we are talking about here.

Blorp.

Locally sourced wood makes for a perfect cook and char

It's hard work, like really hard work, and sometimes frustrating, but Luke Smith is tenacious and hungry so when you see his set up anywhere across southern Arizona, usually at breweries, sporting events and the occasional neighborhood bar, slam on them breaks and get you some.

His dough? Handmade. The mozzerella? Does it himself. That tangy yet subtly sweet sauce? Fresh made every day. What about the sausage? Yep, he makes it. Yeah, but how...

Just...chill.

In our fair city of noted gastronomy, a guy like Luke isn't going to just set up a cheap oven, slap some crud he bought at the grocery store on dough that came from a can that pops loud when you twist it open then charge you like $15 for it because, you know, overhead and supply and demand and all of those buzzwords associated with lackluster products. No. This is a guy, a kid really, that wants you to walk away knowing that you just ate something special from a business that was built from literally nothing by someone with experience and a love of all things authentic and delicious.

Honestly, we just can't get enough of him and his pizza.

His ratio of toppings to dough is absolutely perfect

But it just doesn't stop or start at pizzas. He can also fix you up a calzone, which is basically a pizza gone Hot Pocket yet far more scrumptious and less frozen aisle sadness. Stuffed with pepperoni, mozzarella and ricotta cheese, he then tops it with his signature red sauce, more mozzarella and finishes it with fresh locally grown basil. It is a beast. A tasty tasty beast.

Luke's margherita (c'mon, if you're going to make Neapolitan pizza, you have to have a margherita pizza on the menu) is delicate and full of fresh flavor. One of the best made in town, flour dusted hands down.

We personally love his pizza bianca, or white pizza. A dance of choice ingredients; his homemade mozzarella, locally bottled olive oil then completed with basil and grana cheese, which is an Italian hard cheese that is very mature and has less of a sharp flavor than parmesan but still has a bold bite. You seriously need to try this one.

Okay, lets get down to the nitty gritty here. Our go-to bit of decadence has got to be Luke's bacon and egg creation. Oh...dear...jeebus. So freaking good. This monolith served atop hand tossed dough is a white pizza but covered in wood roasted bacon and a perfectly cooked over easy egg (which is anything but easy to cook, especially outdoors among the elements). Luke then takes the egg, carefully breaks open the yolk and drizzles it all over the pie like the deviant fiend that he is. This pizza is not just for breakfast anymore. Oh no. This one covers all the meals then goes into a late night snack then somehow vortexes itself into a whole new dimension.

What comes between lunch, dinner and beer?

Not too sure, but this pizza is it.

Yep, that would be a perfectly cooked egg right there

Outside of serving up amazing pizzas and calzones, Luke is also available for catering. His prices are totally reasonable for parties up to 20 people. We've considered throwing a "party" just so he would show up and serve us.

Fine, maybe is was just Metal Mark.

To get what we are talking about and to see where Luke will be set up next, you can follow him on Facebook HERE.

Oops, forgot to mention that Luke can also make you a Nutella pizza topped with ice cream for about $4. That is if he has the stuff with him which isn't always the case. So fingers crossed when you cross paths with him.

If not, he has plenty of other fantastic options to fill you up and keep you pizza motivated.

Believe us.

For that, all we can say again is...

Yes!

Cheers Luke!

Camera, Typing and Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
Early Spring, 2017

Metal Influence:

TOXIC HOLOCAUST

"Burn"

More Than Just Quesadillas...

We are about two weeks away from the first day of spring and already it is beginning to feel like summer out there.

The short time we had with "winter", a few nights that dipped in the 30s and days where you had to bring a hoodie just in case, is pretty much all but gone. And I like the cold. I'm from northern California where temps huddle around the 50 degree mark for most of the seasons. In fact, summer has always been the foggiest due to the inland getting so toasty and bringing the dense moisture towards it. I wont quote Mark/Sam Twain/Clemens right now but I'm sure you are familiar with his saying of the coldest winter he ever spent.

Yeah.

See? Tacos, tortas, more stuff like that

It was one of those unseasonably warm days that we lit out in search of some entertainment and shade (aka, the movies, we saw "Logan" and, wow, yeah...wow) but beforehand we needed some vittles and refreshment.

Being in the area of Grant and Craycroft we were lucky to find a hidden away food hut nestled between a convenience store and a crappy cell phone retailer just off that busy corner. It may have been a bit rough getting there and the parking wasn't great but once we stepped foot inside we knew that things were about to get a whole lot better.

The house namesake...so good

The Quesadillas is not that new by any standard. Opening up with little to no fanfare in late December of 2015, it has been the online reviewers and social media sharers over the past year that has gotten this cozy grub shed some respect and notoriety, and rightfully so.

Having only been there once before it was time to check back in and see if the food was still as good as the first time.

No.

It was better.

Movin' on down the line

The place was packed this day. The other time we were here we were the only ones in the place. But a late lunch crowd had crammed into the tight space, a line almost out the door, but luckily we found a table under the TV that was happily showing an episode of "The Chew".

We love that show. Hi Carla!

If the name of your place is The Quesadillas then, well, we better order up some quesadillas. So we got a selection: the carne asada, pollo asado, the championes (mushrooms) and a plain bean and cheese variety. The smiling girl at the counter rung us up and the two guys manning the kitchen were a fury of haste and preparation. Even with a full house our food came out quite expeditiously so we wasted no time and dove in.

Such simple splendor

A place such as The Quesadillas isn't going to change the world (well, it might...) but quality food made with quality ingredients by qualified folk could change your outlook on things.

It was stuffy in the place but we didn't mind. The meat was mesquite grilled and seasoned with care, the cheese had a really good pull and smoothness to it and above all the salsas were tangy, tart and well crafted. Every bite was a treat and every variation of a quesadilla was a simple masterpiece. The last time we were here we tried their ribeye tacos and, man, those lil' cajolery folded bits of madness enticed and delighted. All of it, so most awesome.

You don't need much more than this. Plus with prices barely breaking the $5 mark, you can see why they were jammed on a rather hot day an hour or so past the prime lunch rush.

No wonder we had such a rough time finding parking, everyone in the immediate area had the same idea as us. Huh.

Smart people.

Go ahead, pile it on

It may not look like much from the outside and, sure, it can be a bit of a hassle to find it, get there and then if you're lucky nab a table, but if you can muster up the courage to brave a slight hindrance you will be well rewarded by delicious food cooked and served by talented and kind people.

Oh, and be sure to try their flan, some of the best we have ever had...and we're not big on desserts. It looks more like a cake but tastes more like a spongy sweet custard loaf, one that was mixed and baked in some angelic blessed gilded kiln. Although Anita does a pretty good job as it is.

We think that was her name.

Owning and operating a Mexican restaurant here in Tucson is a risky endeavor; so so much competition. But a place like The Quesadillas will do fine because they only have a few things on the menu and the few things they do have on the menu are uncomplicated yet so complex. You need to get there and try at least one of each.

That's what we plan on doing.

You ready?

Let's do it!

Flan you very much

Camera, Typing and Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
A Perfect Afternoon in March, 2017

Metal Influence:

SLAYER

"Kill Again"

Spinning Meat, Bring The Heat!

Officially trompo means "spinning top", you know like what kids play with. But in the case of Polo's Taqueria (918 W. Prince RD) it means a rotating meat girth of awesome.

The owner, the restaurant's namesake (and no it's not pronounced pollo like 'chicken' but Polo, like the game, or clothing line or Marco's last name), is from Mexico City where this style of cooking meat is totally normal. We are used to seeing beef and such cooked on a slowly rotating spit in Mediterranean or Greek restaurants, but here the flavored goodness that gets sliced up nice and thin right from the dripping tower of carne gets put on tortillas instead of pita. And believe us, this is the real deal.

So ready to get down with this mess.

A fresh slab gearing to get tasty

It's a pretty inconspicuous place, in fact when we drove by it we, well...almost drove right by it. Located in a shopping strip, Polo's rests next to a laundry facility and if it wasn't for the big yellow banner out front with the words "HOT DOGS" written on it we probably would have kept on driving.

Once inside you are treated to an extremely casual environment with a tight menu over the register area and festive music playing to get you in the chow down mood. Polo's has all kinds of yummy offerings such as burritos, tacos, sopes, tortas, caldos and even a hamburger...like all good taquerias do and should. To the left you get to witness to the slow spinning beef mash that is topped with a half pineapple with an onion base. El Trompo!

We almost got down on our knees to worship at the altar of revolving splendor.

Almost.

It was that glorious.

Al pastor tacos in all of their glory

The prices are what you would expect, like almost 2 bucks for a taco, but it is the care and quality that you are paying for and these looked like they are fawned over with loving grace. Plus our orders came out fairly quick, so that was good, because we were plenty hungry and ready to dive into the al pastor that was cut fresh right in front of us.

So stoked.

Full salsa bar at your disposal

Polo's has the requisite toppings and salsa bar and the lady running the front counter even came out and suggested how we festoon each item. That was really cool even though her English was almost as bad as our Spanish, but we got the gist.

Not too sure if they were having refrigeration issues that day but the salsas and lettuce were way too cold and were a bit wilty. That is our only critique. Better that than being too warm and going all gush and limp. Whatever. We are survivors.

After we got all of the tacos, burros and sopes in check it was time to sit down and go for it.

The sopes were kind of the best thing ever

The al pastor was amazing. Really juicy and thanks to the fruit and onion infusion it took on a citrusy and savory whimsy. Everything was fresh and all of it, the chicken, the carne, the cabeza, the frijoles, etc, was delicious.

Our favorite though had to be the sopes, which are basically mini taco salads made with a thick tortilla and filled with all sorts of wonder. These things ruled. Maybe its because you can get a good taco or burro almost anywhere here in Tucson but a tasty sope is a bit of a treasure hunt. We struck gold here folks. Best thing is they are kind of heavy so when you eat one, or twelve, you know you are going to get filled up. We did not leave there hungry.

Next time we visit Polo's we are definitely going to try the Cubano torta and a caldo which is a hearty soup filled with thick veggies and rustic cuts of meat. Can't wait.

Now you know kids. Just keep your eyes open because you don't wanna miss the Mexico City radness of this place even though you need to kind of look for it. And everyone was friendly too. That is always a plus and seems to make things even tastier.

Cheers!

Thank you Polo's Taqueria!

Camera, Typing and Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
The First Time In Almost A Month, 2017

Metal Influence:

MAD BUTCHER

"Burn It Down"

The 2016 Tucson Homeskillet Year In Review

OK, so 2016 has gotten a pretty bad rap this, well, year, mainly because it took so many celebrity lives. You know, Prince, Mrs. Brady, Snape, Princess Leia, her mom...and some others apparently. Yeah, that sucks when someone you admire and has been in your life for so long passes but for us here at the Homeskillet, we actually had a pretty banner year.

This was the year where this lil' dopey blog started to break, in a manner of speaking. We went from just a few hits to a bit more hits. That alone is reason to celebrate! Our likes on social media went to literally none to almost some. Hot doggers! And we owe our success to you guys, the readers, the followers and the believers.

Thank you for believing in the Tucson Homeskillet.

So to look back on a most eventful and delectable year, we compiled the most popular and talked about posts and how they all came about. This should be fun, right? Right.

2017 should be just as awesome if not more so because Metal Mark is now the new food guy for the Tucson Weekly. So we are up to the challenge of eating all of the foods. How thrilling!

Anyway, you ready to get this year in review thingy started? Because we are.

Cool. Here we go...

JANUARY:

Our ode to Bowie and Lemmy

January started off with a bang as we gave you some suggestions on how to cure your hangover from various remedies across the globe which then segued into a piece about Metal Mark's lifelong obsession with the pastrami sandwich. 

But the highlight and most hits came from our blog about the world losing both Lemmy from Motorhead and David Bowie. That was a big shock for everyone. Still is. 

Okay, officially Lemmy died in 2015...ON METAL MARK'S BIRTHDAY! Yep. As the crew settled down for some birthday libations, the notice came out that Lemmy died and we all got even drunker than usual. Then as 2016 rolled in, Bowie called out. Not the best way to start a year.

So what we did was find recipes that were inspired by both iconic artists. David Bowie loved shepherd's pie and Lemmy loved cold spaghetti and we think we did alright with the recipes we found. 

Not to mention we told you how to make the "David Bowie" cocktail and, of course, the Lemmy (Jack and Coke). This was a really fun post and we are so stoked that you liked it as much as we had fun writing about it.  

FEBRUARY:

We reviewed the Vegan Black Metal Chef's cookbook

We at the Homeskillet are far from being vegan but we do like delicious food and we do love us some Black Metal. So when Brian Manowitz (aka the Vegan Black Metal Chef) came out with his own cookbook you know we had to get our greedy mitts on this thing.

The recipes he supplies will make you forget you are eating a dish that has absolutely no animal products in them. With the use of spices, sauces and ingenious components, the Vegan Black Metal Chef takes you on a worldwide journey of flavor all the while invoking the darkness of foreboding lore at the same time being funny as all heck. 

This is a cookbook that everyone needs but probably not everyone will get. We really can't see Aunty Myrtle cozying up to a recipe for aloo palak as the VBMC asks you to "stare into the abyss" while "unholy spirits" command you to add more ginger. 

We love it, we love him and obviously you loved this post. Yay!

*insert wailing banshee shriek here, but...all happy like*

MARCH:

We discovered Yogi's Indian Food and Market

We literally just drove by this place on Stone Avenue and went "Whaaa?"

Not hearing anything about it; no notices or twitters, we slammed on the brakes, stepped inside and decided to see and eat for ourselves. 

Luckily, Yogi's was awesome and we have been back a few times not just for their cuisine but for their vegetables and goods as well. This place rules and we are so happy that they are doing well. 

The food at Yogi's is lighter than most other Indian restaurants in town, and that's what we love about it. Each dish just has a airy freshness to it and when you want to gorge or delicious Indian food (as we usually do) it's nice to come out of it feeling nourished as opposed to feeling like you want to food nap for a few hours. 

So if you are in that area and have a craving for some delicious Indian food (as you should) step into Yogi's and say that you heard about them from the Tucson Homeskillet. Then the Bhati family will just look at you funny and be all "Um...sure."

Trust us here. 

APRIL:

We celebrated the Omar sandwich from the Sausage Deli

April was an awesome month. It was the month where we discovered Manna From Heaven Indian fry bread tacos, ate at the wildly overrated Blake's Lotaburger and explained why we don't like covering downtown eateries. There was a lot going on but the post that took the prize that month was our ode to the Omar sandwich.

The Sausage Deli offers up a ton of delectable treats served between bread but the Omar is an entity all its own. It sounds pretty simple when you break it down: turkey, salami, Swiss cheese, onions, peppers, mustard and Italian dressing, but when you bite into it you know you are eating something special.

We love the Omar so much we took it to the fair, for a beer, to an Iron Maiden concert and then finally let the Homeskillet's own compound cat, Lil' Poundcake, get in on the action.

It was a grand day out with one of the grandest sandwiches Tucson has to offer and we are so happy that you guys liked the post as well.

Cheers!

MAY:

We just can't get enough of Bam Bam Food Truck's Korean / Mexican fusion

It is well known that we are food truck obsessed. Some of our best posts have been because of the efforts and cuisine from the various carts, trucks and trailers set up serving absolute deliciousness. 

In May we confessed to our inclination to Bam Bam's Korean / Mexican fusion. Oh dear lord, is their food fantastic. 

Owned and operated by Fernando Sanchez, a Tucson native that was raised in Mexico, he is able to meld together the tang, spice and elegance of two rather different regions only to fuse them into a savory journey that we still just can't get enough of. The tacos, the yakisoba noodle dishes the...everything, is just divine. We have yet to have a bad dish from him and his truck. 

Lately Bam Bam can be found by the Flycatcher on 4th most nights, so when you're in the vicinity and need some amazingness in your life, Fernando will clearly set you up. 

So good.

JUNE:

We introduced you to Big Mike and the Bronx Tale food truck

Our favorite go-to bar, Danny's, always gets a good supply of food trucks and we were lucky to feature a good amount of them for this site. But one truck that stood out for us was The Bronx Tale. 

Run by the gentle giant of a man, Michael Eure, Bronx Tale dishes out some "New York" style BBQ and the few items he does offer are simply exquisite. 

The ribs are saucy and fall apart at the bone, the pork sliders are tender and juicy but what we really fawn over is his catfish sliders. 

Not too sure if it is the seasoning, the crunchy yet creamy slaw or what but these things are addictive. His mac 'n cheese is rich and heavenly as is his strawberry cornbread which we can't decide if it's a dessert or a meal unto itself. Doesn't matter. 

So when you see the usually hidden red truck with the little sign that reads "BBQ", you need to pull over and get your face into that mess. And its a good mess. Its a New York saucy mess. 

And thanks for reading and sharing this post. It was almost as fun writing about him as it was eating his food. Yum.

JULY:

We hung out with Tucson's own competitive eating champ, Michelle Lesco

It was summertime and things were heating up, even though there wasn't a whole lot of new stuff to write about, food wise that was.

Luckily Tucson's own competitive eating champ Michelle "Cardboard Shell" Lesco hung out with us at Boca Tacos n Tequila and we chatted about what it takes to take down 40 hot dogs in 10 minutes, how one gets into the competitive eating circuit and how the heck does someone stay so skinny when they eat the Lindy's OMFG burger on a regular basis. 

Michelle was awesome, we became good friends and best of all she invited us to come along and try to accomplish some of the other food challenges around town. We still have yet to take her up on it but perhaps in the new year we will be brave enough to take down a 5 lbs burrito or hot wings that register just off of the "are you fxxking kidding me" scale in Scoville units. 

Don't give up on us Michelle. It's just that we need to train for those challenges just like you do before heading off to Coney Island for the Nathan's eating event. 

Does drinking beer and marathoning old VH1 elimination game shows like "Rock of Love" and "America's Most Smartest Model" count as 'training'? 

We hope so... 

AUGUST:

We ate a bunch of weird potato chips and fast food so you didn't have to

When we eat garbage food the general public seems to, um, eat it up. Every time we gather around to ingest sandwiches infused with flaming hot crap or seasonal shakes that taste like minty toothpaste, the few that click on this here blog go a little nuts. 

This time we ate potato chips that were flavored like tzatziki, szechuan chicken, tikki masala and Brazilian spit meat. All we can say is that, well...it didn't go so great. Not that we didn't have fun trying them, we sure did, but the flavor combos on those chips were like dusty, curdled waves of horror. But that's the nature of the food blogging biz. Sometimes you eat the deliciousness and then sometimes you eat the toilet that the delicious food eventually winds up in.  

Luckily for us we were able to hand off these bags of crispy swill to some rather intoxicated suckers, uh....customers down at the end of the bar and leave with a scant amount of dignity. 

Don't try this at home kids. Leave the garbage food eating to the pros...

SEPTEMBER:

We ate the Whopperito and (sort of) lived to tell you about it

And speaking of garbage food. Holy god forsaken crap for crap!

The friggin' Whopperito. 

Ugh. 

We ate two of these things. We are not proud of it. We went a little insane.

Can we move on from this one please?

Thanks.

Done. 

Next...

OCTOBER:

We looked back on some recent restaurant closures and how we felt about them

It's always sad to see one of your favorite places to grab a bite to eat totally eat it. 2016 was fraught with all sorts of closures and we tracked down a few and told you our feelings about them.

We were totally convinced that the Orenccio's fast casual concept on Campbell Ave would make it but it shut down like a week after opening with a cease and desist note on the front door. Yikes.

Tokyo Rice Bowl was awesome as was Cali Grill (sometimes) but the one we are totally fine with being gone was La Fuente because, man, we never had a good experience there.  Sorry, we know it was open for many years but the food will not be missed.

Hopefully 2017 will be a little more forgiving on some of our favorite eateries, unless its that place where we ate the "Best Burger and Burrito in Tucson" because that poo hut has got to go.

Just saying... 

NOVEMBER:

We gave nods to who we think should have won "Best of Tucson"

November kind of slowed down a bit because of the oncoming holidays, Metal Mark going full throttle with the Tucson Weekly and various other distractions. We did get a chance to review the new cookbooks from Marcus Samuelsson and Anthony Bourdain, which was cool, but the one post in November that garnered a ton of hits (aka, more than 23) was our votes on who should have gotten the Best Of in Tucson.

Not to knock his new gig but every year the Tucson Weekly puts out the "best of" which is totally voted by the reading public. A lot of the winners were fine but a big majority, especially in the food and eating department, we just had to speak up against and give our nods to. 

It just feels as if a majority of readers vote for the same ol' places because its what they know and its what they are comfortable with. Now that Tucson is a food destination and the first official "US city of gastronomy", the way we eat and how it is served up is changing...big time. 

So look back and see what you think. Thank you again for all of the shares and comments. 

DECEMBER:

We introduced you to the Sausage Fest hot dog cart

To round out a most sumptuous year we hung out with our good pal Erik "Chili" Hulten and his hot dog cart the Sausage Fest. This guy not only runs our home away from home but he comes up with some enticing combos and fits it all on some squishy buns.

Squishy buns!

Anyway, so the next time you are at Danny's or various events about town you need to stop by the Sausage Fest and eat one of his creations that usually involve lots of bacon, IPA infused 'kraut, fried green tomatoes, his secret chili (hence the nickname) and most importantly Chili's house made pickles. So good and such a good guy.

Thanks again for making 2016 a fantastic, fun and food filled year. We are looking forward to another year of eating, drinking and writing all about it. 

You guys rule.

Cheers!

Camera, Typing and Looking Back

"Metal" Mark Whittaker

New Years Eve, 2016

Metal Influence:

IRON MAIDEN

"Remember Tomorrow"

Thank You For Making 2016 So Awesome!

The Hot Dog Hustle

As you probably already know, if you know us or have been reading this blog for a while, we tend to hang out at our neighborhood bar, Danny's Baboquivari, on most given evenings. It is our transition from work mode to house mode and we are friends with most of the staff there. If you are lucky, you should have a Danny's in your life as well. It's just our place you know.

You know.

Anyway, to make things even more cool about Danny's is that co-owner Erik "Chili" Hulten has purchased an old food cart, fixed it up real awesome and serves up some of the best hot dogs and brats in town. Now that the cool evening weather is here, you need to get to Danny's, order up a real honest drink and dig into Chili's amazing food.

How this guy does it - runs a business, raises a family, goes on food adventures with us AND now operates a hot dog cart - we just don't know.

But we are glad he does.

Chili in full servin' it up action

There are hot dog carts all over Tucson, and we like a decent amount of them, but something about Chili's dogs that we are kind of obsessed over. Sure he's a good friend and, yeah, maybe we're giving him some preferential praise, but, c'mon, the man is a beardy wizard when it comes to creating delicious condiments and combinations.

But we think it's his pickles.

Oh man. Chili's pickles are some of the best we have ever had the pleasure to suck down on a warm summer night or brisk autumn afternoon. Not quite dill, not exactly bread and butter, sorta fridge style but...not really. They are crisp, tangy and best of all sometimes really spicy. If you get a particular chip that is nestled next to a jalapeno....hoo doggies! That's some heat for yo face and butt. But we love it and he always serves them on the side of his delectable creations.

But not just dogs, oh no. The man grills up some serious bratwursts as well. Man style. This is manly food for manly people who want manly meat logs in buns. Chili doesn't fool around. No sir. You see, he's manly. His height, girth and beard should prove that.

When you've got dogs that are slathered in peanut butter and finished with thick cut bacon, there is literally no going back. Why would you want to?

Here's the thing: Chili and his stand, the Sausage Fest, do not do Sonoran hot dogs. That was one decision he made early on seeing as you can get those here in Tucson from almost any cart on any corner.

On a "chili" night, you need these

"I just didn't want to do Sonoran style dogs," Chili says handing off a brat to a customer about to brave the crowds at the Winterhaven festival of lights across the street. "I just can't compete with the amount of those stands here in Tucson. So I just mix it up with different styles and toppings.

"At first the menu included various sausage options, like real exotic stuff such as rabbit sausage. I got a little ambitious. Turns out people just want really good quality hot dogs and bratwursts which I am totally fine with and I think provide.

(Ed.note : He does)

"This is a great creative outlet for me and it's really fun to feed people. I try to be at Danny's every Wednesday and would love to expand to events, festivals and parties, which I have occasionally but even more so. It's hard work but I love it."

Oh....I see what you did there. Funny. That's funny...

Danny's usually has a food truck parked in their lot but when a vacancy opens up Chili and Sausage Fest take over when they can. Lucky of us because the man comes up with delicious arrangements of toppings to go over his already tasty dogs.

"One of my more popular brats is called the East Coast. I make a roasted garlic cream cheese then top it with some caramelized onions. It's simple but really tasty. I've got a Reuben brat that has a home made sauerkraut that I infuse with an IPA beer and then finish with a tart 1000 dressing. So good.

"A favorite of mine is the Arizona BBQ dog where I include a bunch of bacon, thick bar-be-que sauce and two different styles of onions. That'll warm you up on a cold night after some cold beers. But one of my more ambitious brats is called the Cali. The thing is topped with arugula, more bacon, avocado and my own pesto mayo. It's interesting because there is a lot going on with that thing."

Yes we have tried them all and, yes, "interesting" is the key word here. And if by interesting you mean "Aww hellz yeah!"....then yes.

Super good food made by a super good guy.

A manly guy.

All aboard the tube meat train

The secret to Chili's brat and hot dog success just doesn't come in the form of sausages or fun and inventive toppings. For Chili, it's all about the buns.

"They have to be soft, they have to be big and, most importantly, they have to grill up perfect," he says as he applies his signature chili (hence the nickname) onto a brat that is steaming in the early winter evening. "Alejandro's on South 12th Avenue makes the best. Hands down. Now you know."

Now that you know where he gets his amazing buns (umm...that sounded weird) from, and that Sausage Fest is your next go to cart for a tasty brat or hot dog, we just wanted to know how it all came about in the first place.

"This cart was just sitting around, unused, so I bought it earlier this year. It used to be called Uncle Tom's Hot Dogs and, yeah, I wasn't going to use that. So the first order was to change the name. Short of buying a restaurant or a food truck, the cart allows me to financially try the food business. It's tough but it's also something one person can manage. So far so good. I'm having a blast."

Good, because we are having a blast eating your sausage and buns!

Wait. That sounded weird again...

Los pickles es muy caliente

To see where Chili and Sausage Fest are setting up next you can follow them HERE.

Most likely they will be in front of his other business, the one where you will most likely find us inside. And when Chili is grillin' up some of his super awesome treats, you will most likely find us with mustard and bacon bits on our faces.

It's what the man would want.

And we wouldn't have it any other way.

Cheers!

The man, the myth, the mustard

Camera, Typing and Eating
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
Middle of December, 2016

Metal Influence:

LED ZEPPELIN

"Hot Dog"